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High school friends reunite after many years to spend a weekend in the mountains, but when everything goes wrong, there is no time for girl bonding.
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All Girls Weekend movie full length review - Why?!
This movie makes Twilight look like cinematic gold by comparison, and that is not to be taken lightly. I won't go through the entire plot here or point out all the inconsistencies, that would take all day.
Instead, I'm going to be as methodical as possible and break this dumpster fire down into a few select categories: characters, story, cinematography and editing.
1) The characters are uninteresting and terminally stupid. For example, let's say you're in a car with 4 of your buddies and the driver decides to randomly pull over. The driver then insists that everyone takes a 3 mile hike into the woods. What do you, a sane and rational person do? If you said: 'stay in the car', give yourself a cookie! If you said that's not at all suspicious and go into the woods, punch yourself in the genitals.
2) This movie takes 90 minutes to tell a story that could have been told in 15. Here, I'll do it in one sentence. Angry spirits in the woods demand sacrifice. That's about it. Everything else in the remaining 75 minutes is filler of the most asinine degree.
3) So boring to look at. This movie takes place in two locations: a house and the woods. There are exciting ways to film the outdoors, of course. The Revenant made it look awesome. This movie is just flat angles, terrible lighting and completely lacking in the language of film.
4) Holy mental deficiencies, Batman! There are editing errors all over the place here.The one sequence where one of the main characters gets chased by a bear was so badly handled that I laughed until my lungs exploded (I got better). They use stock footage of a cub, not even a full grown bear.
In closing, this is not a slasher movie as the artwork may lead you to believe. This is an attempt at a supernatural sort of affair like The Blair Witch Project...except all the creativity has been replaced by severe brain trauma. Don't watch it, for your own sake.