Barbie: Spy Squad movie full length review - Good if you have nothing better to do
Edit: I found this to be Boring and a very extremely totally predictable storyline. As i watched the screen i realised this is another stereotypical Barbie role, same old goody-two-shoes like in all the rest of her outdated and strange movies.
Why are her movies strange and weird? Here's a list:
1. It's always bothered me and i wonder why does it have to be so black and white with this girl, every-single-time, without exception? Why is she so determined to throw herself into danger. People like the modern reluctant hero, the flawed hero. Not this do-gooder, self obsessed, from the 60's, who rushes forward into danger even though she may die in the process. And within 10 minutes of watching a Barbie movie i can easily figure the entire story out. Why is the ending so obvious.
2. People find do-gooders annoying, or suspect do-gooders of being motivated by some other undesirable reason ? like "everyone look up to me, look at my squeaky clean image, now go and buy all of my merchandise."
3. Every movie is just a rehashed version of the previous one, taking on all of the world's problems, same old I'm so nice, I'm so kind ambitious yet irritating woman, taking center stage.
4. But just how inspired should we be by fictional women who alienate others. Character flaws in movies are admirable, because as human beings we are flawed and audiences love learning about it, but not Barbie.
5. I don't understand why they don't modern up, move with the times, look at what other people are doing, like Frozen, Shrek, How To Train Your Dragon, and look at all the success they are having.
6. I noticed in the papers Barbie sales are plummeting, what is Mattel doing wrong, according to them: nothing, we are perfect! It's not that i myself or the people around me are tired of Barbie being a princesses it's the stories are garbage. Using friendship/ discovering her true self/ Blah-Blah-Blah Whatever, Barbie defeats all before her and wins.
7. With this movie Barbie Spy Squad there was no inner turmoil or conflict. I could not find a single reason why I should like any of the characters, and I didn't. Flat, one-dimensional, don't people have hobbies,strengths, weaknesses, likes, dislikes, a personality.
8. Okay, kids like pets. I get it. But every single movie. Really? Isn't it time to move on? So tired of seeing some animal crawl on stage to be greeted with gasps of delight and " You're so adorable, You're so cute, You're so cool."
9. I could not find anything new or innovative here, with the gadgets, Headquarters, laborotories, British boss, etc,it borrows heavily from old stuff like James Bond Spy Kids Totally Spies etc
10. I didn't know the girls had superpowers, but all the way through they perform better than any world class gymnast could even dream
11. And finally we have Patricia who decides to become a team player at the last minute and give up her life of crime ? Unbelievable.
12. Barbie needs to step up and change, also hire a decent writer who can craft a story.
13. This doesn't feel like a story to me, very artificial,fake, wrong. It's like they took Shoes, Dresses, Make Up, (like they do every single time) and everything else they thought girls could possibly like and built a story around it. It's too much relying on pandering and very little talent. Too clichéd also, trite, all this Cool! Wow! Totally! Excellent! No one really talks like that.
14. All Barbie movies are the same, just a different career or backdrop, that's why no one is interested in them, why would they when the other studios are producing way better stuff. Our kids would much rather buy a PlayStation game than any Barbie merchandise.
15. In the last movie Barbie went on a hunt to find treasure > treasure found> story ends.
17. This movie Barbie wants to catch a diamond thief > thief gets caught>story ends. So bland and predictable.