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Jessica and her fiancé Evan just moved from the city into their dream home on a quiet suburban street. Soon after, Jessica catches her seemingly friendly new neighbor, Simon, in a strange lie and can't let her suspicions rest. The danger escalates when Simon lures her inside his home and imprisons Jessica in his secret bunker, meticulously decorated in the idealized style of the 1950's.

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Kept Woman movie full length review - I wouldn't keep it, but I might rent it out...

A couple have their flat broken into. They go inside BEFORE phoning the police, and promptly get more stuff stolen by the homeless guy still there, who holds them at gunpoint. Deciding to move house, they end up living next door to a weirdo who dresses like a throwback to the 50's.

He abducts the female to keep as his own personal slave in an underground shelter, making her a 'kept woman'. Will she ever escape? Can she ever rid herself of the awful dresses she's forced to wear? And who'd thought the police force could be so stupid?

Yes, I KNOW this is supposed to be a Made For TV Movie, but c'mon... the creep in the dapper suits and bow tie has been linked to the disappearances of students and has even been questioned by the police... So why isn't he linked to the investigation? Who knows. And the fact the husband believes his wife left him permanently after the most minor of arguments, leaving behind her phone and various other possessions... Hear that creaking noise? That's credibility being stretched to breaking point.

Still, it's not all bad. The movie paints a picture of a claustrophobic environment well, where Stockholm Syndrome can easily set in and your old life could soon fade to a distant memory. The acting is of a higher calibre than usual for this kind of production, and the intense moments scattered throughout will probably have you watching until the end. Until the climax, that is... When all the subtlety and understatement goes out the window in favour of a brainless violent confrontation, not to mention the cheesiest of 'uplifting' messages tacked on as an addendum. Yawn.

Still, seen much worse. Oh, yes I have... 5/10